Blog post on the plane to Toronto Meet Up 

Thoughts From The Plane

Hey these seats are pretty swanky I must’ve either hit the wrong button or mom must be some muckety muck in the airplane points collection world. Normally I ride on the wing of the plane gremlin class, so this is a big upgrade. I may just want to stay on the plane and skip the meet up…. If it weren’t for the imperative importance of my journalism.

I can’t wait to go to downtown Toronto and distribute my pamphlets with my alternative theories on the John Diefenbaker assassination (it wasn’t a heart attack) and if there is time meet up with some friends from Newgrounds, and some people I thought may be friends but have been downgraded to acquaintances, I hope to re upgrade them in my grand list of friends after meeting them IRL, but I sincerely doubt that will happen because of my obvious let’s call them “personality quirks”. Of course this is post the usual pat down I get from the good people at Garda when they match my medications up to their little chart, don’t worry I was certain to be liberal with my lube as is Canadian tradition when you’re taking it from the federal government (It’s pride week after all.) In my carry on is a little tablet a Syntrus T-shirt (so I don’t get stains on it) and other necessities for the dystopian cronenberg inspired hell scape that is Toronto, better known as “hog town” to the rest of the country, and “Canada” to Americans, Yep with a major basketball team, a major baseball team, and stop and frisk in minority neighborhoods you’ll have all the comforts of home. Toronto of course not only known for its vanity and it’s racism but also for the CN Tower I imagine many of these newgrounds regulars after witnessing the majesty will go to the gift shop get models and try to shove the sharp pointy bits up eachothers asses not because they’re gay and I’m some sort of midwestern Canadian homophobic (it’s pride week) but because they are basically animals and animals do that sort of a thing, and according to the age on the box they are old enough to play with the models as they see fit, so I’ve set my expectations in a place that I think is fair..  I’m sorry eh, I’m probably projecting my anxieties, you see, I’m pretty sure my jealous stalker that calls himself “God,”you guys know the dude, he’s from Hamilton, he is going to roll up in a van discounted because well it is pride week, and kill us all, as Toronto is just a short trip away for him, since he said something to that effect on the NG forums when I was 15, and since the meetup was mentioned publicly by a very famous person, but that’s probably not going to happen right? and if it does? It’s not going to happen for another 4-5 hours, and as my friends are often quick to remind me “what the hell were you really doing with your life anyway?” You know what forget aboot it it’s nothing, he probably won’t get a discount on the van to roll up here and murder us, and you know what else? that’s what’s wrong with this country, if a gay man suffering from psychosis wants to get a van and run over me and all my acquaintances from the internet and can’t get a discount because he’s gay, then motherfuck equality. Forgive me I’m pregaming pretty hard and I’m pretty sure this is what the Ford brothers call a stupor. 

On a very serious note it’s so nice of Henry Eyes’s family to extend a welcome to all of us who are grieving and attend his celebration of life, Henry was a creator on Newgrounds that touched all of our hearts. 

https://open.spotify.com/track/0H95N2ClQtTQ6MNZg7gxXW?si=6PrL5iShSnGWl14UYkX5yQ

Be sure to check out my album “the atmosphere” now out on spotify! I know you guys love it when I spam my links! :D 

Lobstermango and Tacopug and Daemon say hi!