Hello my bots. I am here briefly to tell you about my latest project King Arthur, so far it is three tracks long and I am working through my musicians writers block to try to come up with the next three. The album art is okay, but still a work in progress.

the whole damn thing is a work in progress.. one of the things that is taking the wind out of my sails (I'm a ship in this metaphor) is the amazing quality of the three tracks , everything I have created so far to follow them up sucks by comparison. (my ship blows your mom sucks)

Anyways King Arthur (newgrounds.com) check it out!

Hello Newgrounds community! What is going down with my bots?

I thought it would be appropriate to go into my music and what I have been up to lately creatively. I have been moving towards making my music more accessible to income streams, for my inevitable world takeover via kidnapping of Bill Gates, and swapping his brain with an orangutan, and making the world population sterile by putting melatonin in various flavored milks, but I did manage to squeeze out a couple of singles, while I was lactating, for your enjoyment!

1st is Powdered Drink Mix, my love letter to Dr. Dre and Giorgio Morodor it's sort of a electro funk thing, I don't know fuck you shut up.

Next up is Portable Power, which is a retro future market vibe kind of thing, people keep telling me it sounds like a Wuhan Wet Market, after consulting with my international marketer I have no knowledge as to what they are referencing, glory to Peoples Republic of China.

Please Follow Me on Spotify!!!

In IRL non schizo posty news: lately I've been busy as all hell at my warehouse job, as people habitually purchase things online after being cooped up for so long, here in Alberta we are easing restrictions, and life is surely going back to normal. If you liked the music in this blog post please drop me a loonie or two over on teh bandcamps. :D

Evil Robot

Syntrus

It is Triothy Day you guys!!!! HOLY MOLY!

What up my bots!

It's been a tumultuous week, steeped in disarray. I have finally done the full release of boner pills across all sorts of websites. This Instrumental ep answers the question no one asked "What do erectile dysfunction drugs sound like to an idoser?" and the answer is a chill ez high. A high perfect for the act of love making, or studying, or "studying". When I was in college I had this roommate whomst had relations with 9 women at once, I have never felt more jealous and alone. Please enjoy the upside of my shame.

Boner Pills

Remember school is going to be back in session soon, soon it will be time to study, you will need me and my chill study beats.

dictated not read -Syntrus the evil robot

Boner Pills | Syntrus (bandcamp.com)

What's up Syntrus Army!

Big shout outs to @lobstermango for this dope ass art and concept of my fanbase!

Guess what you bots? if you are reading this on July 29th it's my birthday! I'm 32, holy shit right? I'm an old ass robot now running an old ass OS while the world changes around me shaking nervously as the hip shit I loved goes out of style... here I am still here posting my chill ass beats to Newgrounds, and my latest track Ginseng should be releasing real soon, and I am feeling good about my next release, speaking of which @Staggernight hooked me up with an early birthday present in the form of album art for my upcoming project, check it out here: BONER PILLS

He tells me it's really hip right now, I'm not sure why....

be sure to check out boner pills here: https://syntrusyyc.bandcamp.com/album/boner-pills

https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/syntrus/riverside-park

https://syntrusyyc.bandcamp.com/album/riverside-park

So Riverside Park is finally completed, it has taken some time mostly because I am working in a warehouse involved in the shipping of gym equipment across Canada, and since all the gyms are closed everybody is getting home gyms, this means I am moving incredible amounts of tonnage on the daily and my exhaustion is real, when I'm not sleeping I'm eating and I get to have that brief little interval with my DAW and my new Laptop making the purest cut music on the market for your ears. I've been incredibly lonely, I mean my Mom is here at the house with me yelling at me to take the trash out or whatever, but I'm talking about you know, carnal needs, recently I matched with some nurse chick on teh tinder who was interested in me and my music but when I showed her my nice calm song A Nice Sunny Day Downtown (newgrounds.com) she got quote "Serial killer vibes" and promptly unmatched, to this day I have no idea what she was on about...

So yea Riverside Park featuring cover art by @houndkidz is a five track ep inspired by this whole covid thing and the park I like to take refuge in when the stress is getting to me, its coming to all major streaming services Via Distrokid and is availible for purchase right now on bandcamp and of course available to check out as a playlist here on Newgrounds. ENJOY MOFUCKA!

This has been Syntrus Says

It is finally here!

The highly anticipated EP Galactic Soda Featuring Newgrounds Front Page Classics Like Making the Numbers Fuck, Actually It's Electro Funk, Crooked, Anxiety and of course the end credits from CaramelDansen Collab 2020 Power Dad Anthem (Gerald Finegroooves) is finally released! Featuring Iconic Syntrus robot Album Art by @daemonplus, you can now blast the essential Power Dad album from your car on the way to McDonalds! What an age we live in!

Hey everybody, just wanting to let you know how thankful I am to have this platform to talk to you all and share my music with you and express myself. Unfortunately due to circumstances in my life, outside of my control I am having to take a social media break, and practice some “social media distancing” for my mental health. Social Media Breaks Are Good For Your Mental Health

Since some events have transpired relating to COVID 19, and relating to issues of a personal nature with regards to my family, I will be logging out of discord, twitter and Newgrounds starting this Friday at 11:30 pm and not returning to my usual internet haunts until March 12th, to preserve my mental health, heal, and get out of the hype centric, sensationalist media loving, over connected world, we all live in.

A large number of my friends operate creatively through this website, and it has been a joy submitting, exchanging ideas, and working with so many artists and musicians, but right now my family needs me more.

One Love Syntrus the evil robot!

God DAMNIT I don't have anything to say! The Blog is called Syntrus Says! I have been given the ability to speak, wait a minute, speak? I'm typing. I got the art made by @lobstermango, and it should say "Syntrus types", but it's too late the thing was made it's here. Here I am with my little triangular headed robot made out to look like the Illuminati, I'm supposed to be like telling you how I'm going to take over the world, and triggering your schizophrenia with my um... army of.. um mutated clams, but lets get real, there is absolutely nothing, nothing, I could say that would be more frightening than our collective reality right now... okay now the blog is getting preachy...who am I Julia Roberts? With my horse face and my scented candles, coming on the damn TV to talk down to you, or like.. tell you about the world you already occupy like you don't already know? But DAMN IS LIFE stressful, you either don't go into work and have to deal with not having much human contact, or you're essential and you’re treated like over worked, expendable, human refuse.. just so the other half can be comfortable, add to that the political polarization not just in the US but in democracies around the world, and we have a shit storm of stress and bull crap happening to us, and all around us, all the time, and when we band together and buy shares in GME they still find a way to fuck us...

How do you cope? How do you deal with this stuff?

Personally, I've been spending a lot of time making retro computer sounding music I released 50 songs in 2020, and 5 so far in 2021, it's good to have an outlet like that, I make my own noises and I drown out the world. In a weird way the music makes it self, and I merely transfer it into my DAW. It's hard to explain but you're on Newgrounds so you can probably relate. It's like when you gotta get the shading just right on the anime tiddies you draw.

So since the pandemic, the political shit, the wall street shit, its happening, I have decided to adopt a pay whatever you want model to my album Submit. Go check it out, download it for free, making it brought me joy, maybe it will bring you joy as well...

This has been Syntrus Says